I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
