Quick, to the slutcave!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize