I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Houston, we have a squirter
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Randomize
