i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize
