Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
my liver is dry heaving
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
