You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize