I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
