I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
