How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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