I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
