White coat. Heels.
I'm going to jail i love you
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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