1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
