so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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