I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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