She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
