i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
