I wannas sexs uuuuu
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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