at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
