I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
