The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize