We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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