ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Bring me that man meat
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
