I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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