the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
