pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
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