i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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