I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
We named our party play list daddy issues
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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