I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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