And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize