history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize