he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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