She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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