shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
