matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
