# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Come see our sink grown plant.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
