There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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