these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Just puked most of my soul out..
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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