my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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