Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
