I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
