Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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