How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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