Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
