I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
