im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
