it wasn't lemon gatorade
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I got inside last night via doggy door
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize