the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
We are two peas in an std pod
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
