I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
