I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
