i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
