i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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